[Mason Lancaster]

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We make it so damn easy, we get bored

what's good for you is good for me

[break]

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As much as she insisted that he didn’t need to apologize, that he didn’t have anything to apologize for, Mason was sure that he could have, at the very least, made the whole situation easier. If he wasn’t such a buffoon, oblivious to social cues and unable to pick up on subtlety more often than not. [break][break]

That had been something he’d struggled with his whole life. He really tried to get better, especially after Cami. Though he still failed at reading people correctly even now. [break][break]

“Honestly, according to a couple of my friends I probably should be. But I just.. I guess I just really don’t see it?” He shrugged. It was hard to explain. Probably harder to believe, for someone who hadn't known him a while. [break][break]

It was part of the issue with Cami. He didn’t notice when she was upset with him, just like he didn’t generally notice when he was getting flirted with. Cami had put up with it longer than anyone else had, but looking back on their relationship he couldn’t blame her for leaving. He couldn’t even blame her for throwing the self help book at him. [break][break]

At least he’d read it. Tried hard to make some changes, to be more discerning and mindful of the people he cared about. It was hard. And it was almost impossible with strangers still. [break][break]

Maybe a part of it was a product of his job. He had to shut himself off emotionally, had to keep from letting the patients and families panic become his own. There was a calm he had to adopt in order to maintain his composure, but it bled over into other areas of his life. [break][break]

She called his offer nice, but declined. Mason wasn’t sure if it was because he’d misread the signs before, and maybe he’d offended her, or if she just didn’t want to and was trying to be nice. Either way, she said no and he wasn’t about to push the issue. He’d respect that she didn’t want his company, even if he thought it was a better plan than her being alone. [break][break]

“Okay. But I’ll probably be out there anyway, if you change your mind.” He thought about going home and grabbing Max, taking him for an early morning walk through the park. He already knew he wasn’t going to sleep, he was too wired, had too much to think about now to be able to drift off.

[attr="class","MASON_basic_note"]Tawny Vokes | blah, this is all over the place. let me know for changes

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[Tawny Vokes]

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[attr="class","post-littlecloud-title"]BLIND MY EYES, BOY TOO BRIGHT

[attr="class","post-littlecloud-subtitle"]wanna know am i really made of this, am i really made of that?

Her gaze lifted again, eyes roving slowly between his, as he admitted that his lack of perception had been noted by friends as well. Apparently, it wasn't just an off-night for him, then. Which was a little interesting. Curious. As was the thoughtful, somewhat... faraway and reflective... look on his face that followed the admittance. What was he thinking there? Or remembering? He shrugged his shoulders and Tawny breathed a laugh. Latching onto her curiosity, she wielded it within her; planted her feet solidly upon it and used it to haul herself from the darker place she was undoubtedly descending into. [break][break]

The slip and slide into that place was inevitable at this point. She knew that. She had known it as she laid in bed, unable to find sleep. Had known as she'd grown gradually more tired in the week before. Been aware of it looming over her when she sought the gym. Had known it'd grown so, so close when she made her passes and watched him. It was all a familiar and recognizable cycle. But... with this... she could stave it off for just a little longer. Buy herself another minute. Even another night, maybe. [break][break]

"Really don't see it, huh?" she echoed quietly, mouth parting in a faint grin as she lifted her brow. "In a room full of mirrors?" How silly. Or modest.[break][break]

Mason let her know he'd be there if she changed her mind and Tawny nodded, half-mouthing, half-breathing a barely-there 'okay... thanks' as she turned and made her way to the room's exit. Then she paused, eye drawn to the shelf lining the wall. [break][break]

Beside the stacks of towels and bottles of cleaning supplies, there was a sticky-pad of feedback surveys and a dropbox that they could be slipped into once filled out and folded up. She worked her lip between her teeth, worried it for a moment, and then sucked in a decided breath. "Okay, look... Mason," she began, tone successfully light and flippant as she set aside the things in her arms, pulled a pen from the cup of various utensils, and uncapped it. "I promise this one's not a line. Some sly way of slipping you my digits or whatever." [break][break]

She paused to shoot him an amused (and somewhat teasing) grin as she tore one of the surveys from the sticky pad, flipped it to its blank back, and bent forward to start writing. "But I'll leave my number here. Honestly," her brow leaped and she huffed another amused breath. "Tonight's a big flub on my part. Not just with the treadmill, either. Everything else, too. By all accounts, I'm the one coming out of this a massive weirdo. But, well... I dunno... you seem you could be a little weird, too."[break][break]

She finished scrawling her name and number, recapped the pen, tossed it in the cup, and then turned to look at him. She studied him for a moment, fingers drumming against the shelf, and debated saying the next part or not. She could leave it there. Let him assume what he wanted. Most people could get somewhat defensive, or bottled, when she mentioned her profession. "I'm a therapist," she admitted, and rolled her eyes with a spreading grin as soon as the words left her. "I know that's probably a little shocking, right? Cause I'm kinda," she lifted her hands to wave lightly around her head, as if to imply she was a bit scattered. Or loony. "But... I think I'm a lot better at... other people... than myself."[break][break]

Her lips pursed small, swished to one side of her face and, after a moment, she shrugged. "So, if you ever want to talk. About anything. Yourself, included. If you just have another late night... I have them, too... or if you want to... work on... anything," she scrunched her nose, eyes pinching closed before she turned and began gathering up her things back in her arms with a faint shake of her head. "That one may have been a little bit of a line. But just a little one. I can't help myself sometimes."[break][break]

"Or you can just toss it when you leave. No offense taken. Understandable, really." Everything held to her chest again, she opened the door and positioned herself in its frame, pausing before she slipped out to hitch her shoulders and quirk her mouth one last time. "I hope you have a good morning. Thanks, again."

a little messed up, do you feel it?[break]a little bit of this and a little bit of that

Tag: Mason Lancaster [break]
Give me a nudge for any changes or tweaks!

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[Mason Lancaster]

[googlefont=Allura][googlefont=Montagu Slab][nospaces]

We make it so damn easy, we get bored

what's good for you is good for me

[break]

[attr="class","MASON_basic"]

No one ever seemed to believe that more often than not, he didn’t see it, that he didn’t get it when he was being hit on. Maybe he should start assuming it as the default, but that felt like it would be too cocky, too arrogant. He wondered, not for the first time, if there was something wrong with him. Or if maybe he was just too closed off to the fact that he could be likable. He’d spent so much time being angry, lashing out at everyone around him, when he’d finally gotten that under control he had built a wall around himself. Perhaps that was part of it. He didn’t let anything fliter in now, for better or worse. [break][break]

He needed to work on that. He’d been trying to work on that. He’d also been failing at it. [break][break]

Mason thought that was the end of it, that she was going to leave and he’d gather his things and head to the park — just in case — but then Tawny paused before leaving. He watched her peel a survey from the pad full of them and grab a pen. He had no idea where she was going with her tangent about being a weirdo, and about him also being a weirdo, but he was intrigued. [break][break]

She couldn’t possibly know how right she was about him. Then, with the declaration that she was a therapist, he wondered if maybe she did know. [break][break]

As she continued on, laughed when she pointed out what was now blatantly, clearly a line. “You know where I’ll be for the next little bit if your head starts hurting, or if you just want company or whatever.” He watched her leave, then gathered the rest of his belongings, tossing them inside his bag haphazardly. [break][break]

He did take the survey with her number as he left, slipping it in his pocket as he headed out toward his car in the parking lot.

[attr="class","MASON_basic_note"]Tawny Vokes | the end? it’s really short, let me know if I need to make any tweaks

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